I had a little token I wanted to give him for this occasion: a vintage-style camera pendant. I had reservations giving it because it's something women usually wear here. I've yet to see a guy wear vintage-inspired necklaces here or abroad. I really thought that it was an appropriate present since he liked taking pictures. I had even considered looking for a different necklace chain so that it would look more masculine. I wonder if he would have liked it...?
I wish I hadn't waited then. I know I'm deluding myself in thinking that giving him a small token would change what happened. I keep telling myself of that sad fact.There was an update from Gaki's site where Yongha's gym instructor talks about him. Looks like Yongha's been carrying the burden of his father's illness since late last year! Seeing Raymond's story, and realizing that Yongha's been carrying that burden all this time... it's making his death more 'tangible'.
(x-posted at my LJ.)
